The master plan of the homosexual agenda has been revealed.
The National Security Agency has intercepted messages using warrantless wiretapping that confirm the worst fears of the Bush Administration. It seems they have uncovered a plot to redecorate the Statue of Liberty to resemble Freddie Mercury, lead singer of Queen. The Administration fears that the call to activate LGBT sleeper cells around the country has already gone out through encoded messages in Madonna's new CD as well as on Bravo TV shows.
The security threat level has been raised from yellow to pink - the highest on the country's color-coded system.
In a press conference, President Bush stated:
My answer is bring them on. One word sums up probably the responsibility... and that one word is 'to be prepared'. We know their strategery and will not be defeated.
Martial law is being declared and Bush has already tapped Mike Huckabee to spearhead the round-up of the rouge militant homosexual activists into confinement camps. The camps will be run by Ted Haggard and Focus on the Family, where detainees will be "ungayed".
Also included in the intercepted agenda:
• change the national anthem to Donna Summers "I'm coming out"
• change the Navy's uniforms to include rhinestones (the homosexual agenda has an infatuation with sparkly seamen it seems)
• have a U-Haul in every garage
• replace baseball and football with softball and pro-golf as the national pastimes
When asked by reporters for evidence of the intercepted transmission, the White House spokesperson said:
Trust us. Has our intelligence ever been wrong?
The government is asking for all citizens to be vigilant and report any suspicious activity.