As I said yesterday, to me coming out is a process. You have to do it over and over again in a variety of contexts. My coming out to my friends was easy as I talked about yesterday, and it even provided one of the "legends" within our circle of friends.
I present to you, "The Legend of the Spring Form Pan."
I had been sharing my friend's apartment for a couple of weeks after moving to DC and our relationship, I thought at the time, was purely platonic. She and I spent a ton of time together simply because I was between projects and living in her house.
One evening however, she attempted to "take it to the next level" with wine, dinner, etc. Picking up on this vibe very quickly, I retired to my bedroom early for the evening- professing to not feeling well.
The next day she, I and another friend went to lunch at Johnny Rocket's in Union Station. I had resolved that I need to come out as soon as possible to make sure that her feelings didn't get hurt.
A mutual friend had a birthday approaching and my roomie was talking about making him a cheesecake. "Do you have a spring form pan," I asked. "Of course," was her response.
The third friend at the table piped in with, "Bo, you are only the guy I know who would know to use a spring form pan that doesn't make me question his sexuality."
"Maybe you should," I said.
The conversation proceeded for about 2 minutes before they both stopped cold and asked me to repeat what I had just said.
"Maybe you should question my sexuality," I responded.
So needless to say, my friend and my relationship changed that day and the subtle advances stopped.
A couple of years ago I was thrilled to be her best man when she and her wife got married. For their shower I bought them a complete set-
Of spring form pans.