Sum-up: I really liked this show. We got to know a good deal more about Ted Haggard and what he's going through now.
Half of what he said made no sense at all. If God loves him the way he is now, and he thinks that sexuality is something that can't be changed, then why does he think heterosexual, monogamous relationships are the "ideal" and that he should try to change? If he thinks he should accept himself the way he is now and that lying and self-denial are wrong, then what's up with the "heterosexual with issues" line, instead of saying that he's gay or bi or queer?
It doesn't make much sense to analyze him from the perspective of what he says. The man's a liar, a smooth liar who lies like he talks. He didn't mention the latest accusation against him which came out a couple days after the show was taped and said he didn't because of "privacy concerns." (Uh-huh, that's why the young man he molested got paid hush money and Ted called him up to make sure he destroyed evidence.)
It's easier to understand him from the perspective of what he wants. The clip from the HBO documentary on him in which he called himself a "loser" because he was poor (after getting $300K from the church and not having to cover his own housing), was pretty revealing: he was able to blow through that money quickly to maintain a certain lifestyle and he attached his self-worth to having those things. The wife, the family, the respect, the fame, the fortune, all of that seems like what he wants, and he seems to be willing to do whatever he needs to do to get those things.
Oprah did a good job with the interview and tried to clear up some of the confusion, but of course what he's saying will be confusing because he's pretty confused himself. Gayle, though, seems to be in a different place in her understanding of what her husband is going though, which indicates to me that they don't talk much about it.
One thing that Oprah didn't get into was the drug use. Meth is highly addictive, and from the way he was buying it from Mike Jones, he seemed like an addict. While he went to pray-away-the-gay camp in Arizona for a month right after all this came out, I doubt he was able to get help for his drug addiction.
Maybe this is how he managed to spend that $300K and his family's life savings so quickly? It merits discussion as well, considering that that's an actual sickness. But, oh well, it's not what everyone thinks of when they think of Ted Haggard.
What did you all think of the show?
4:54: Ted: I apologize to Mike Jones and to the homosexual community.
Oprah: Do you regret being a homophobe?
Ted: I wasn't hateful. God's ideal is heterosexual, monogamous relationships. Ideal is no divorce.
4:49: Ted can't get a job, moved from rental house to a hotel. Debt piles up. Life sucks for Ted and his family.
Wait, didn't the church give him $300,000 when he left? And he was making bank off that church for a while. Where did that money go?
Now he's back in Colorado and Ted doesn't feel like a loser anymore.
4:43: Oprah: You're gay or what?
Ted: Sexual identity is too complex to be put in a box.
Gayle: It's a choice.
Oprah: You're wrong. I don't understand what it's like to be gay, but it's who they are and denying it is wrong and God doesn't want you to deny it.
Ted: I have wiggle-room for personal responsibility.
Oprah (having an "Ah-hah!" moment): Your personal responsibility was to stop lying, not to stop denying yourself! (Ted and Oprah high-five)
Ted: Jesus changed me. Homosexuality isn't a sickness.
The older Haggard kids are there. They're both saying that Ted's downfall was a way to connect with him. They're both speaking in buzzwords, but the boy is doing a better job at it.
4:35: Oprah: So you were kicked out of Colorado by your church in exchange for hush money. What's up with that?
Gayle: It was to protect us, and I'm sure if it weren't for the media we coulda stuck around.
Ted: I'm sorry.
Oprah: For being a hypocrite?
Ted: Yeah, and not being an ideal.
Oprah: Gay doesn't work that way. Wouldn't the ideal be coming out?
Ted: No, it was demons. [Yes, he literally said "demons."]
Gayle: Sexual identity is a choice.
Ted: No, you're wrong, inclinations aren't a choice, but identity is.
4:28: This is actually a lot more interesting that I thought it would be. But this dude really just loves getting attention, no matter how. Sinner, saint, whatever: look at me!
Ted's wife Gayle is on now.
Gayle: I knew that he had had problems and was seeing counselors, but "I felt as though he was winning this battle."
Oprah: How was the sex?
Gayle: Amazing! Woo hoo!
But she doesn't go into why Ted had to take meth to have sex with her....
4:20: Haggard: I would have killed myself if my family left me. I even asked my wife to divorce me but she refused.
Oprah: You represent gay people everywhere and are "tortured by it." How can you deny who you are? Do you believe accepts homosexuals?
Haggard: Christ accepts everyone; I was hoping for inner transformation.
Oprah: Still attracted to men?
Haggard: I do have sexual thoughts about men, but they're not compulsive anymore. I thought I could pray away the gay. And yeah I lied about buying meth and throwing it away.
4:12: Oprah: Are you gay?
Haggard: I'm a heterosexual with gay attachments. Sexuality is complex. I was deeply in love with my wife.... Oops, I mean am! Am!
Haggard: I'm from Indiana! And was a bed-wetter until 6th grade! The real issue is that I was molested, not that I'm gay.
4:06: Good synopsis of the story, the power Haggard had, and the lies. I really forgot half the details and how funny that car interview was.
Haggard: I lived in two worlds, church love and "struggle with homosexuality." I just wanted to be free.
Oprah: Wanted to be free or were you just caught lying?
Haggard: Yeah, and you just caught lying me again.
3:50: Snowed in here in Indiana, so I'll be watching Ted Haggard on Oprah. Watch it here with me - I'll be live-blogging the show.
They won't be talking about Grant Haas, the teen who came forward this past week with allegations of sexual molestation.
After this show was taped, a former church volunteer, identified as "Grant," leveled new allegations against Ted. Grant accuses Ted of performing a sex act in his presence and sending explicit text messages in 2006.
Ted responds, writing: "Oprah, I did not reveal the relationship on your show out of privacy concerns--even though there was never any physical contact. I have regretted my irresponsible behavior. I apologized to Grant, my family and the church two years ago. I now ask him again for his forgiveness as well as the people of the church."
What will they talk about? Stay tuned.