Sara Whitman

Evil plan is working

Filed By Sara Whitman | February 18, 2009 1:30 PM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: John Tucker Must Die, Million Dollar Baby, plan is working, Purple haze, spending time with child

So far, the week has been great. Ben and I have been chillin' and it's nice. Last night, we argued about whether to watch "John Tucker Must Die" or "Million Dollar Baby."

I won.

He watched on and off. He kept running into the other room to check his IM account. But when he was in the living room, he snuggled with me on the couch. It's been a long time since he's done that.

When the movie got to the very sad part, I started to cry. Okay, I started to sob. Sad is not the word for it. I could only imagine having to make that kind of choice with a child of mine and I could not do it.

Simply could not.

Ben was amused and somewhat concerned. Why are you crying? He asked.

I explained, I could not do that. I could pull the plug on your grandmother but she had lived her whole life and was old... different. I could not do that for you.

Mom, it's ok. I'm ok.

I know.

You would have liked John Tucker much better, he said.

Um... it's okay to cry at a sad movie.

Today, we went shopping. I'm not much of a shopper and it was a challenge to be interested, but not too interested. If I liked something too much? Back on the shelf. After, we went to lunch.

A nice sit down lunch- he was merciful on me and didn't insist on Burger King.

While we talked about every American Idol contestant that ever was, and what they wore, I slipped in a little drug/peer pressure conversation. He told me one of his friends had been approached to buy "purple haze."

She said no, he reported.

It was awkward, he said.

We talked about ways to get out of that awkward moment. He decided he would simply say, Thanks, already got some.

I'm not sure that's the best answer but it saves face, and I get it.

Overall, my evil plan to spend quality time with him has worked perfectly. I have one question though- what the heck is purple haze?

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I always thought it was a Jimi Hendrix song. Apparently it is also slang for really good pot :
"Weed with purple hairs/leaves. Really good high. Peaceful high, different than most." -

The problem with his response is that, the pusher will just keep approaching him, thiking he is a head, and thus, a customer in waiting.

Not the best way to go if you want to go the whole drug free route.

Of course, it is not like I am against a little weed, but I feel the same about it as I do booze, only if you are mature enough to handle the consequences of your actions, should you partake.

Yeah, he's a little young for any color of haze, methinks.

hello? he's 13. no drugs, no booze, no no no. too young.

I agree the response is not crystal clear but he had never seen the kid before and hasn't since. we talked about other ways, but he's 13 and um... knows everything.

So you missed the part about my saying you need to be mature enough to accept the consequences.

Hell, I know people who are well past the "legal" age, that should be kept away from the liquor cabinet, and I have known 13 year olds who would have no problems with something like wine for dinner or what not.

It is good that you are trying to teach your son something about drugs and booze, but too many times the lessons that come across leave the whole idea of personal responsibility out of it, so that when they finally can or do indulge they may not be mature enough despite what the law says, to handle it.

Now this is no criticism, just obeservation. You are the parent "on the ground", so you know best.