Alex Blaze

Turning Beavis and Butthead around: McCain can't manage a beaver

Filed By Alex Blaze | March 02, 2009 3:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Politics
Tags: beaver management, John McCain, party of beavis and butthead, paul krugman, Sarah Palin, Twitter

Paul Krugman called the GOP the "party of Beavis and Butthead" last week because instead of actually thinking of ways to get us out of this depression, or materially improve people's lives, they're just snickering over tiny programs that sound kind of silly.

So, not to sink to their level, but Gawker found this on McCain's Twitter feed....


Hehe... beaver.

About the beaver management itself, you can learn lots more about beaver management on the North Carolina Wildlife Resources Commission's webpage. Turns out beavers can be huge pests if not managed properly. They're also trapped frequently, which means that someone should be keeping track of them.

But the GOP has never been about engaging others in philosophical or policy debates rooted in either reality or logic. Their main argument on gay rights is "Butt-fucking's gross!!!" Their main justification for war on Iraq was "Saddam did 9/11!" Their main response to crime is "Lock 'em up and throw away the key!"

John McCain wasn't any better. His response to the energy crisis was "Drill, baby, drill!" His main idea for dealing with Iran's nuclear aspirations was "Bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran." His response to women fed up with lack of movement on feminist issues was Sarah Palin.

Not really a thinker, that man.

As a sidenote, Jerame was right. Twitter's pretty cool.

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I got the answer. If you need to know how to manage a Beaver, you need to ask June Cleaver. Duh!

"Gee, Wally. I want to be a girl."

"Ah, Beav. You know if you turned into a girl, Eddie Haskle would give you the business. Then, I'd have to give Eddie the busuness for giving you the business."

"I know. It would turn out to be a bad business move."

Maybe, like Ward, he was too hard on his Beaver. It just shows that he doesn't know how to manage a beaver.

Or you could just look at Cindy for another explanation. Cuz you know there's no way in hell she's letting him anywhere near her... Would you?