Waymon Hudson

You've Got (Hate) Mail

Filed By Waymon Hudson | May 28, 2009 3:30 PM | comments

Filed in: Living, Site News, The Movement
Tags: hate mail

Like any good online geek, I stumbled out of bed this morning and went straight for the computer to check my email, Twitter, and Facebook. Green tea in hand, I opened my computer and started scrolling through the tons of emails and ran across one that caught my eye:


It is not natural nor does it fit in religion.If it was meant to be there one only be one sex. As ir is it takes two sexes to produce a family. Wake up and smell the roses. You are not Gay you are queer.

Michael Bailes

After wiping the spray of tea off my computer screen from laughing at the spelling and grammar, I realized it had been quite a while since I got hate mail. The nutty bile seems to ebb and flow towards my me and my husband, so I wondered what had set off this nutter. I must be doing something right if I'm getting under the religious fanatics' skin... again.

I sometimes judge the impact I'm having on the world by the amount of hate mail or threats I get. It's a way of making something that could be disturbing into something positive.

Plus, they make for a great scrapbook. Or a lovely decoupage table.

I've always been surprised by people's need to contact others directly and threaten, demean, or attack them. It seems like a lot of effort for little return- but maybe I'm just lazy.

This latest missive is by far one of the more tame ones I've received. During and after the airport fiasco in Fort Lauderdale, we got tons of hate mail, both at home and at work- much of it very violent. It peaked again when we helped lead the charge against the former Mayor of Fort Lauderdale, the bigoted Jim Naugle, moving from not only letters, but also phone calls and people coming to our house to threaten us. With my husband's campaign and election, we again got calls and mail, some threatening to bludgeon us, others calling us the "scum of Oakland Park".

So being called a "queer" (which I don't mind- I actually like to identify as that) isn't too big of a deal. And while I'm not a big rose fan (I prefer gladiolas or some other flowers more), I suppose I could take out more time to smell lovely flowers- although that does seem like a somewhat fey hobby, which kind of goes against the spirit of the email.

And yes, I could get annoyed about the "you need two sexes to be a family" comment, but really, it took so long to decipher the sentences that I forgot to get angry.

So I'm left wondering if this is just a random act of stupidity (well, I'm not really wondering about that- it seems to be a given) or the beginning of another spike in crazy emails, calls, and letters.

But heck, I must be doing something right if someone took the time out of their day to write me. They could have spent that time smelling the roses, so I feel rather important.

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I hate the marriage=family reasoning to hate gay marriage. What about infertile couples? what about those that *gasp* decide to not have kids at all? Are those people no longer married? I just found out that I am infertile after one kid, if my husband dies/divorces me & I try to remarry will I not be allowed to since I can't have more babies????

Stupidity sucks but you must be making a difference if they are writing you. You aren't somebody on the internet until someone hates you!

You've got it exactly right, Waymon. The more fundies and right-wingers you piss off, the more of an impact your work (and Anthony's) is having on the masses.

A friend who works professionally in talk radio once told me after I'd gotten my very first hate email ever about my show that I should consider it a compliment. He said that if I can motivate listeners to exhibit such strong negative emotions over something I said on the air then I should also understand that it works both ways, but those who like what they hear are always less likely to make themselves known.

So congrats, dude! You got it workin'!

I just wish I knew what I did so I could keep doing it! :)

And why are the emails always so hard to decipher? Don't bigots have spell and grammar check?

Apparently not. Either that, or they are too busy frothing at the mouth to make sure that what they write is actually coherent.

I haven't gotten any actual hate mail yet, but I got a nasty comment posted on my Facebook wall (of all places). Sure enough, the grammar was such that the poster said the opposite of what she meant.

I actually got my first twitter hate message the other day too. It was from http://www.twitter.com/BigDaddy777p and said:

Your 'marriage' is Bull$hit anyway, dude! haha

I'm not sure what the point of the "$" is or why they are following me anyway. His comments are full of crazy rants. LOL. Gotta love the fundie nutters.

A few years ago I received hate mail at my house. It was in response to a letter to the editor that I had written and was published in The Star. At first I got scared, but then I learned that other PFLAG parents had gotten a similar letter from the same person. I saved the letter - I kept it as a badge of honor.

I hate to sound condescending, but I would imagine that the reason there were so many mistakes in the letter you received would be because these people don't seem to have much formal education. They depend on their bigotry and misunderstanding of the world to keep them going. Maybe instead of focusing on their hate, they should go back to school.

Daniel Frommherz | May 29, 2009 11:45 AM

Annette...Oh my God what is this world coming to thinking of an educated idiot no less.

Alec Baldwin has a great post up today on Huffpost about the couples who decide not to procreate - Why Childless Straight Couple Make the Case For Gay Marriage. fundies keep proclaiming that the purpose of making babies is the reason lgbtq shouldn't be allowed to marry. he argues that logically, any straight couple that decides to not procreate shouldn't be allowed to marry.

better yet: maybe no one should be allowed to marry until they actually make a baby, with the exception of a couple who physically can't. they should be required to provide the signed affidavits from doctors to verify it. then marriage can happen and they can adopt or whatever if they want. if they don't, they lose their married status.

oh, and no one gets any of the benefits that the governments give to married couples until the little bundle of joy is in a crib in the house. seems fair to me. think of all the extra money the IRS and state governments would get until there is a child.

could solve a lot of problems...

p.s. bravo for posting the guys name with the message. assuming its his real name it gives a label to idiocy.

diddlygrl | May 28, 2009 8:10 PM

It kind of makes me wish there was a expiration date tied to the meaning of Descartes' aphorism
" I think, Therefore I am."

Then so many Fundies would expire that we need not worry about them.

Pondering::::::::::::as I do often. Why is this person reading about LGBTQ? What brought him here? Just wondering!
Love, Aunt Nancy

I think you hit the big closeted gay nail on the head, Aunt Nancy... :)

tobyhannabill | May 29, 2009 1:25 AM

As an organizer for NEPA Pridefest 2008 I was thrilled when protesters traveled hundreds of miles to protest us. We are now organizing NEPA Pridefest 2009 (The only festival in North Eastern Pennsylvania) and are going to be twice as large this year due to the publicity.
I was the Vice President of my colleges chapter of the NAACP at that time and was nervous when I received an award for my efforts on community service here a few months ago. Then they made me President and I realized that publicity is publicity, good or bad. They also ellected me as a board member of my church starting in July.
The biggest upset came when a guy driven by jelousy wrote a scathing letter to a friend of mine for being just too open and political. Apparently he took offense at the fact that I announced that in addition to belonging to about 8 organizations I also helped organize a Pride Festival.
I understand hate mail. What I don't understand is hate mail from the very people you are trying to represent.
Explain this to me?

Rick Sours | May 29, 2009 7:45 AM

This is truly sad but why should you or any of us in the LBGT community be surprised. Just look at
Miss California USA running around telling us we are evil; the state of California tells us we are not equal: the list goes on and on.
As John and I always say there is no place for
hate. Imagine if the haters used just twenty-five of their energies toward tolerance.
This is quite upsetting to us since we moved to
Florida from Arizona where we were subjected to
raw hate and harassment. We tried to stop this by
legal means but the bigots and their supporters
lied (under oath) in court.

Hate mail kills me sometimes. I get one or two every week, usually after I've posted a particularly snarky opinion on something.

The latest one stated that I was an "PIECE OF **** IMMORAL LOSER DRUG ADDICT!!" and ugly, and that "YOUR MAMA DID NOT WANT TO HAVE YOU, IDIOT!"

The funny part? It was because of a response I had made in regards to religion and marriage equality. Yes, this lovely bit of prose was sent by a (supposedly) devoutly religious person. Go figure.

I have no idea where the "drug addict" part came from. I don't smoke, an barely drink, where on earth where they get the idea that I do drugs?

I think I'm going to start blogging my hate mail. Keep up the good work on, I just moved to Florida, and am thrilled about your partner's Election Results. :)

Well Waymon, think of it this way: if you get no hate mail at all, it means you're not doing much of significance in this world. -Marie