Bil Browning

18 Naughty Things You Can Only Say On Thanksgiving

Filed By Bil Browning | November 24, 2009 1:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: open thread

Note: I ran this list last year and Projectors had so much fun coming up with an extra two naughty things to say on Turkey Day that I thought I'd post it again this year. Let's see what y'all come up with this time!

A friend sent this funny list of things you can only say on Thanksgiving. I thought I'd use it for today's open thread question. What else can you only say on Thanksgiving? I know how clever Projectors are, so I'm looking forward to the responses.

  1. Talk about a huge breast!
  2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
  3. It's Cool Whip time!
  4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
  5. That's one terrific spread!
  6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
  7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
  8. Its a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
  9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
  10. Don't play with your meat.

Rest after the jump.

  1. Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.
  2. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
  3. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
  4. You still have a little bit on your chin.
  5. How long will it take after you stick it in?
  6. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
  7. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
  8. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

So who's got the other two quips to bring us up to an even 20 things you can't say?

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wanna try my special gravy?

I could stick it back in if you think it's not hot enough....

I vote for this one!!!

Don't forget to get a taste of those delicious pink hams ... you know what they say, "They're the other white meat!"

Mmmmm, the drippings are delish!

Can someone toss the salad for me?

Oh my, I can't stand sausage stuffing, Eeuuu!

That's OK, I luv sausage stuffing! I'll have my serving and your serving, too!

Boy, after a big one like that, I'll need to get some sleep.

I love breast!

Can I have another piece?

I love your pie.

I can't wait to bite into that leg.

Boy, after a big one like that, I'll need to get some sleep.

I love breast!

Can I have another piece?

I love your pie.

I can't wait to bite into that leg.

The giblets make good gravy!

And, of course, a great recipe:

Turkey Dressing
2 cups dry bread, chunked
l tsp. Sage
¼ tsp. Rosemary (ground or leaves)
l/2 tsp. Pepper
¼ tsp. Salt
2 cups Popcorn (uncooked)

Combine ingredients and place in cavity of
Turkey. Bake in 350 oven, allowing
Approximately 20 min. per pound.
Turkey is done when popcorn blows the arse off the bird.

And remember to return their turkey baster to Denise and Rosemary --- Denise says they are trying to get Rosemary pregnant.

I'm stuffed

Do you think its done or should I stick it back in?

Can I butter your bread?

Nice yams

Dark meat is moister

Is that gravy on the tablecloth?

Can you stuff it for me?

Stuff it good.


Rev. James M. Evans, Jr. | November 25, 2009 2:25 PM

These are absolutely awful! And I am thankful for each one of them. It sort of helps keep somethings in a sort of useable perspective. Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone. Just be thankful that you're not a turkey. Wakka, wakka, wakka.

If they fall asleep when the're finished then you know they've enjoyed themselves!

How hard can it be?

Let's turn up the heat and see if that works.

Dark meat is much healtier for you.

Would you like whipped cream?

More Please.

I need to unbutton my pants.

Can I give you a hand?

Just shove your whole hand in and clear it out

Use the baster to recapture the juices

Sprinkle it with some seasoning and then take your hand and rub it all around and make it juicy