Sara Whitman

Mary Cheney: Look in the Mirror, Sister

Filed By Sara Whitman | May 30, 2010 10:00 AM | comments

Filed in: Politics
Tags: Bill McCollum, Florida, gay adoption, gay parents, lesbian mother, Mary Cheney, Republicans

The news today is all good- my sister's numbers came back great, she's feeling much better, the sun is out, and I'm still keeping an eye on this pesky ocean, making sure it doesn't go anywhere.

I read today that Mary Cheney is helping a homophobic candidate in Florida, Bill McCollum. He opposes same sex couples adopting. She sits on a board of an organization that has bought a bunch of ads for the Republican Attorney General who is running for governor.

Makes me wonder what kind of conversations are being had at that house over dinner. I mean, how is she ever going to explain that to her kids?

I have always tried to be consistent with my kids, whether it be about bedtime, consumption of large amounts of sugar, or watching R rated movies. Sure, there are a lot of gray areas in life. But to have had a baby with your lesbian partner and support someone who would not give her the right to adopt... I can't quite wrap my head around it.

I can understand the Republican belief that there should be smaller government, less taxes and privatization of pretty much everything. I don't agree, but I can understand it. But to go so far as to support someone who thinks you are immoral and shouldn't have the child you do?

Don't mess with my babies. I couldn't stand to be in a room with the man, let alone funnel money to his campaign.

Does she not understand that some people cannot afford to move to another state where there are LGBT positive laws? Not everyone can move addresses for when the baby comes. Besides, if all the queers left Florida, the economy would collapse.

At least South Beach and Ft. Lauderdale's.

It's one thing to have somehow rationalized it to yourself, but kids aren't stupid. They smell ambivalence like blood hounds going after a fox.

Maybe she really does hate herself. Maybe she is ashamed and has no voice on the board to make any real change. I almost feel sorry for her.

But I don't. She's wealthy, privileged and has a responsibility to live honestly. She benefits from the laws people in the community have fought so hard for. And in turn, tries to take them away.

How can she look in the mirror? How can she look at her child?

I can deal with Republicans. But not with someone who has sold her soul.

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Paige Listerud | May 30, 2010 10:34 AM

I don't know if you have been following the "Dr. Rekers and the Rentboy" scandal, but AG Bill McCullom is tied into it. Not only is Mary Cheney a hypocrite when it comes to Florida's gay adoption ban, but so are the gay consultants to McCullom's campaign, who adopted their kids from out of state. See the bottom of this article, or read the whole thing:

I call it "gay on gay hate crime."

But Equality Florida could sure use your help, folks, to turn over the 40 year-old gay adoption ban that Anita Bryant's campaigns spawned in the 1970s.

Robert Ganshorn Robert Ganshorn | May 30, 2010 10:51 AM

Dearest Sara,

If you had attempted, as I have, to read her incomprehensible book "Now It's My Turn" unfortunately published by Threshold Editions in 2006 which has to be owned by either Coors Beer or Halliburton Corp you would know one thing.

She is a Lesbian.

She is an empty cipher who has a slavish love for her father. She dedicated the damn book to her mother and father and it is a vacuous document supporting nothing. She acknowledges Scooter Libbey in her preface. It is a laundry list of day by day on the VP campaign trail with her as her father's campaign manager.

Page three: "Personally," I told him, (conversation with her father) "I'd rather not be known as the vice president's lesbian daughter." So, there you have it, she has already completely and fully subordinated her life and lifestyle to the goals of her parents.

On the rear of the dust jacket reads:

"My mom once offered this observation about child raising: You can never make the list of rules long enough. You can say, 'Don't run with scissors,' and 'Don't cross the street without looking both ways,' but there will always be something that's not on the list, like 'Don't stick an eraser up your nose.' (I won't say who in our family tried that one out.)"

She is an emotionally detached and crippled person who has lived in a bubble of privilege that defies ordinary understanding. Her book ends in 2004 with her as director of vice presidential operations for Bush-Cheney 04.

To his credit, former VP Cheney was supportive of domestic partnerships publicly far ahead of any other republican. But I guess one of the lesbians has to become personally pregnant for it to really work for him. Adoptive kids?, well, that is why there are workhouses. Adopt from overseas?, don't make me laugh wine through my nose.

steve talbert | May 30, 2010 11:41 AM

As someone who has dealt with her in person, Gashorn is right on about being a cypher. She isn't empty, though, she is full of privelege both in her social world and with money where she believes that she can live however she wants and really doesn't care what other people get to do. actually, she probably likes the fact that she is special enough to get a child and many people aren't. It was written large all over the Bush-Cheney regime (no, i am not politicizing something that was so obvious).. rules are meant for the little people to follow to keep them in their place. I am not exaggerating.

or maybe being gay isn't the most important thing in her life, and she cares about other issues more.

Robert Ganshorn Robert Ganshorn | May 30, 2010 11:22 AM

OK Benjamin that's real class. She is supposed to care for the child her partner gave her, but be opposed to other couples adopting.

By definition you suggest that her child is not the most important thing in her life. Sorry that you have had such bad parenting.

Regan DuCasse | May 30, 2010 2:28 PM

Hey Benjamin, some of us are not allowed to forget, or have the privilege of never being acutely aware of the difference that literally subverts all that other people NEVER have to think about.

Such as getting married, and having children that without question, are yours and you are never under any threat that they will be taken from you, or that the state doesn't FULLY support you raising them.

When you're married, you are married ALL OVER THE WORLD, wherever you are in life.
Your children won't have to worry about losing BOTH parents if the biological one doesn't survive or divorce the other.

Being gay is only the most important thing in SOME gay folk's lives, because the heterosexual majority insinuates their control and power over your life for that reason alone.

I have never seen such spiteful and contrary acts against a minority SINCE slavery and Jim Crow. Most of us here are a generation that didn't experience it.
But it's legacy is still very much alive and moved to another minority now. Watch and learn.

Mary Cheney lives in another world she knows won't be touched by the same threat and spite that other gay people experience.
And she cares not to change that factor for others.
She is, effectively a selfish snob, if not coward and offers no support to the minority she belongs to because she doesn't think she does.

She, most of all, also has the social station to do the most good, and is insulated from the most damage were she so motivated to bother.
THAT is what makes her especially self centeredness more egregious.

She knows she doesn't have anything to lose, and a great many lesbians would have more to gain.
Being a lesbian might not be important to her, because she HASN'T lost anything (nor is at risk to) because of it.

being a lesbian is not the most important thing to me. being a mother is.


I'm certain she doesn't care much about being a lesbian. and yet she takes advantage of all the work we've done.

I was raised to believe being of a certain ability and privilege meant you were expected to give back, to give back graciously, and with respect. to help your community that helped you get to where you were.

it was a gift to be so lucky. one to be shared.

cheney takes and takes and tears the community down. Its not about not being a lesbian as a priority, it's about being a good person, and a good parent.

in my humble opinion.

diddlygrl | May 30, 2010 9:26 PM

She comes from a class of wealth and priveledge, her being lesbian has so little to do with her political beliefs that it isn't funny. For her it is all about getting daddy elected, or seeing that someone from her class of people gets elected no matter whaat they have to say about Gay issues.

She is the nobility, we are the serfs, we aren't supposed to understand our betters, just obey them.

Thom, Cape Cod | May 31, 2010 12:55 PM

Cheney reminds me of the Jews who were in cahoots with the Nazi's in the concentration camps to keep the other Jews in place, while sending many of their own to their deaths. Shame on you Mary!!!!!!

Politics = whore. Lesbian or not.

Robert Ganshorn Robert Ganshorn | May 31, 2010 11:23 PM

I think that is the easy way out. Compromise is in the nature of politics, but this is capitulation.

Politics in Florida is intertwined with the Bush family. Mary may be a plant while the real objective is to elect Rick Scott who is mounting a huge media blitz. He is alleged to have been a partner with GWB in owning the Rangers.

The comments on Mary Cheney are certainly warranted but the real money trail and Bush link leads through Scott.

I remember an ex of mine who actually read her book and loved it. He was like "I'm not a Democrat because marriage isn't the only issue I care about" after he read it. I was like, yeah, my politics aren't informed only by same-sex marriage, but I somehow avoided becoming a Republican.

The Florida attorney general's antigay animus is less important, imho, than the simple fact that he shamelessly and emphatically laundered at least $120,000 of taxpayer money (and probably a lot more, in other instances) to key figures among the Christian Right, despite warnings from his subordinates.

What other Christian Rightists received quid-pro-quo money from the attorney general, and what laws are applicable against such blatant bribery and religious favoritism?

In short, Mary Cheney is supporting a vote-buying crook because it's in the family interest.

You know, I'm not sure I "get" the argument that a person might have something more important in her life than her sexuality. Unless you're a hermit, your sexuality is probably the one single most important thing that defines our relationships with other people, whether that's our partners or our children.

But it works for Mary Cheney, I suspect, because she has so much internalized self-hatred that she defines "homosexuality" as that brief activity that she engages in at home behind closed doors. She's ashamed of it, and even having a child is her way of telegraphing to the world, "LOOK AT ME, I'M NORMAL!" And because SHE is ashamed of it, she's ashamed of people who have actually integrated their sexuality into their identities. She's angry because they live such full, complete lives without lying, without hiding, and even celebrating who they are. She is what Sherwood Anderson called a "grotesque," a person whose personality is beautiful and well shaped on one side, but gnarled, ugly, and twisted on the other. We should pity her -- and let her rot.