Prince Gomolvilas

How Much Stuff Can You Sneak Inside Your Man Hole?

Filed By Prince Gomolvilas | July 21, 2010 3:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Entertainment
Tags: prison, tattoo

Sometimes these posts really just write themselves. So I'm just going to cut and paste this Associated Press report:

Jail Officers Astonished by Inmate's Contraband

WENATCHEE, Wash. - Police in Wenatchee are surprised at the amount of contraband an inmate was able to smuggle into the jail rectally. The Wenatchee World said the man internally carried a cigarette lighter, rolling papers, a baggie of tobacco the size of a golf ball, a smaller baggie of marijuana, a 1-inch smoking pipe, a bottle of tattoo ink and eight tattoo needles.

Sgt. John Kruse said the volume of contraband left officers wondering.

Chelan County Regional Justice Center administrator Phil Stanley said the man was booked into jail Wednesday night to serve a disorderly conduct sentence.

Nothing was found in a strip search. A jailer later found a plastic bag and duct tape in the toilet. After questioning the inmate surrendered the contraband.

Look, I know laws are laws, but, if some dude wants to smoke out and give himself tattoos enough to shove the necessary materials into his naughty place, then I say let him!

Which bring us back to my headline. Engage with it however you see fit.

[Thanks to A.L.F.]

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Wilson46201 | July 21, 2010 3:11 PM

Having seen pornos of egregious fisting, I'm not astonished at all with what all could be accommodated if the spirit and/or flesh were willing!

That doesn't sound like that much stuff to me. Your average zucchini is bigger than that.

I've known guys in California who were into fisting. I must agree that the stuff mentioned here is not that voluminous compared to what I've seen. But when you have that many different items stored away at one time, I would think it must be a major operation just to unpack so that you can have an actual bowel movement. I also expect the guy somehow must have had a generous external supply of little plastic bags.

And finally, let's hope that terrorists never get good at stuff like this ...

(0.0) WOW! ...but can he carry luggage?

I am surprised he didn't try to stuff his getaway car up there for his jail

This just doesn't seem like that much stuff to me.

Wendell Cochran | July 22, 2010 12:39 PM

I'm amazed to read what can be stowed away in a rose bud. His must have been a cabbage rose for sure.

Note to self: most Bilerico readers apparently have HUGE cavities.