What the world needs now, according to inventors trying to build a better trap for your baby batter, is a condom made from beef byproducts. Which begs the question: what did Lady Gaga know and when did she know it?
A "Grand Challenge" was issued earlier this year by a global health organization to update the design and practical usage of a device that has been virtually unchanged for 50 years, and some very interesting candidates have emerged.
Have trouble putting it on? How about an applicator that clamps it onto your favorite member? That design isn't simply intriguing, it's downright lovely, winning the "Most Beautiful Object in South Africa" award (edging out my personal favorites, the Top Six Sexiest Men of Mzansi).
Other designs include condoms created from a sci-fi material known as graphene, and another that gradually tightens around your penis, which is a thought that will have me crossing my legs for the rest of the day.
Maybe a few new toys in the nightstand will increase consistent condom usage among gay men, which has remained around 50% since the 1980's (and with the CDC reporting that inconsistent condom usage is as effective as never wearing one at all, God knows we need options).
Thank goodness for Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP), the most unfairly maligned scientific breakthrough in a generation. Going on "the pill" has been proven as effective as condoms when taken correctly and it is well tolerated with few side effects. Please don't believe idle chatter that insurance companies are not paying for it (can you name one person who has been denied? Hmm. Didn't think so). The manufacturer of Truvada, the standard PrEP medication, also have a patient assistance program that allows for a healthy income if you are uninsured.
New condom designs are great. So are new options to back them up. Happy boinking!