When I was little, if Jehovah's Witnesses came to the door and my parents weren't home, my brothers and I would duck and cover. We'd keep completely still and not answer the door to make them think we weren't there. If we saw them coming, we'd even turn out the lights and shut the shades.
Turns out we were doing it wrong. What I should have done is answer the door and told them I was gay.
It worked for the man in the video below, anyway - check it out.
Will you use this technique the next time the Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons, or other door-to-door anti-LGBT missionaries make the rounds in your neighborhood?