John M. Becker

Blame the Gays, Vol. 548,783: Sao Paulo Drought

Filed By John M. Becker | November 13, 2014 1:00 PM | comments

Filed in: Living
Tags: blame the gays, Brazil, drought, Sao Paulo, wingnuts

sao-paulo-drought.jpgWe gays are used to being blamed for all sorts of natural and man-made disasters -- everything from 9/11 and Superstorm Sandy to Spain's national debt and the demise of Olympic wrestling has been laid at our feet. (Clearly, the person who thought gays killed Olympic wrestling didn't think that one through very well.)

The latest cataclysm being blamed on Teh Gay is a catastrophic drought in São Paulo, Brazil, Brasil Post reports:

The population of São Paulo has already heard about a number of "culprits" to blame for the dramatic drought and water shortages in the state this year. But one legislator in Bahia, Brazil's fourth most populous state, claims to have unraveled the mystery surrounding the real reason for the lack of rain in São Paulo: the Gay Pride Parade.

Sounds like a joke, right? Well, the lawman in question, Pastor Sargento Isidório, decided to immortalize his "argument" on video to banish any doubt that he TRULY does believe it. And he quoted Bible passages to back him up.

"When the skies close up and there is no rain, because the people have sinned against you-- here I'm talking about the big Gay Pride Parade that takes place in São Paulo. The largest Gay Parade in the world is there (...). It's the first sign of the spilling of the chalice of God's wrath due to homosexuality in our Brazil," says Isidório pompously.

The pastor invited religious people across the country to pray for five days for the citizens of São Paulo, so they do not have to pay for the "sins" of the city's gay inhabitants. Only after the "sin" of homosexuality is forgiven, Isidório says, will the rains return to fill the reservoirs of São Paulo.

A quick look at the São Paulo forecast shows a good chance of rain for the next three days, so it looks like god's fine with the gays after all.

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