Living: December 2011


Feeling Backward into 2012

Filed by Kyle Bella | December 30, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

A personal examination of my assault in New York at the beginning of 2011, how this experience changed my my views throughout the course of the year, and what this redefinition reveals about political goals in 2012.Read More


Christians Put Gay Couples in the Crosshairs

Filed by Bil Browning | December 30, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

I'm guessing there's some Freudian explanation why the North Carolina Family Policy Council went with this imagery to promote the state's upcoming vote on whether or not to ban on same-sex marriage, but, geez, I just can't figure out what it could be...Read More


Chicago's Cardinal George Doubles Down on Bigotry

Filed by John M. Becker | December 29, 2011 | 4:45 PM | comments

Refusing to back down from comments he made in a recent interview where he compared the LGBT movement to the Ku Klux Klan, Cardinal Francis George, Archbishop of Chicago, opted instead to double down and defend his inflammatory rhetoric.Read More

church.jpg (PostBlurb)

Top 10 Lies the Black Church Tells About Being Gay

Filed by Viktor Kerney | December 29, 2011 | 11:30 AM | comments

I want to address the myths many LGBT people continue to hear in the black church. Here's a list of the top ten lies the black church tells about being gay, lesbian, or transgender.Read More


The 'Game-Changing' Year in HIV/AIDS

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 28, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

2011 has been a game changing year in the fight against HIV/AIDS. There have so many positive advances that advocates are celebrating while we still mourn.Read More


Christmas 2.0: Who Could Be the New Santa?

Filed by Don Davis | December 26, 2011 | 5:30 PM | comments

As an intellectual exercise, I started thinking about what a different Santa might be like, who a few candidates might be for "Santa 2.0" and why. So go grab a cookie and let's have some post-Christmas fun.Read More


New Year Guide: Top Ten Bi Gifts

Filed by Amy Andre | December 26, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

Whether you are a member of the bi community, or an ally, you've probably got some bisexual people in your life - and they deserve holiday presents even if they don't celebrate Christmas! So why not give New Years presents instead?Read More


Accepting the Angel Food Pie Challenge [Comment of the Week]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 26, 2011 | 1:30 PM | comments

I warned readers that my mom's alchemical formula recipe for angel food pie is difficult and a couple commenters said they were willing to face the challenge head on. There's three comments to lift up today - with a funny ending.Read More


Queer Families: Poignant Holiday Letter

Filed by Tobi Hill-Meyer | December 26, 2011 | 12:30 PM | comments

The holiday season can be very difficult for queer people who have strained or non-existent relationships with their families. I grew up in a queer family and have been lucky enough that being trans was only an issue for a couple of years.Read More


Cardinal George Should Resign for Comparing Gays to the KKK

Filed by D Gregory Smith | December 26, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

People expect more tolerance and compassion from the spiritual leader of a million people - at least I do. I also think Jesus would have expected better, too.Read More

Anita Mann Reads 'Twas the Night...' with a Twist

Filed by Mark S. King | December 24, 2011 | 5:30 PM | comments

It's that special day, my friends, when the stockings are hung (!) and it's time to get cozy and listen to a drag queen deliver "Twas the Night Before Christmas."Read More


My NY Times Profile: The Red Kettle Menace

Filed by Bil Browning | December 24, 2011 | 11:30 AM | comments

Jerame says I'm going to be insufferable today. I told him to address me as "The Red Kettle Menace" when he refers to me from now on, so I guess he's right. *grins*Read More


Mom's Angel Food Pie Recipe [Open Thread]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 23, 2011 | 9:00 AM | comments

My favorite holiday treat is my mom's angel food pie. They're a Thanksgiving and Christmas tradition. There's really not much to it; it's a sugar/starch base with a whipped cream topping, but I'm a horrible cook and this recipe is rather difficult.Read More


Will Defenders of DADT Stand By Their Dire Predictions?

Filed by Dr. Nathaniel Frank | December 22, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

This week marks a full year since Congress passed, and President Obama signed, the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell and three months since the new policy went into effect. So how do we assess the change, and, equally important, does it even matter anymore?Read More

What's In a Greeting?

Filed by Rev Irene Monroe | December 22, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

With Ramadan, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Winter Solstice, and Christmas all going on this time of year, one would think that an all-inclusive seasonal greeting emblematic of our nation's religious diversity would be embraced by us all with two simple words - Happy Holidays.Read More


Exploring the Troublesome Link Between Body & Identity

Filed by Drew Cordes | December 22, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

Lately, I've been falling into heated debates with myself on a contentious problem - my body. Or rather, our collective bodies, and what they mean (if anything) in relation to who we are.Read More


The 2011 Gay Picture of the Year

Filed by Bil Browning | December 22, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

After Navy Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta won the ship raffle to be the first sailor to get a homecoming kiss when her unit made it back to port, the servicemember made history as part of the first gay couple to participate in the tradition.Read More


Zimbabwe MP Arrested for Saying Prez Mugabe Is Gay

Filed by Bil Browning | December 21, 2011 | 1:30 PM | comments

You know what they say about the lady who protesteth too much...Read More


A New Place for Queer Homeless Youth in Atlanta

Filed by Toshio Meronek | December 21, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

Rick Westbrook and his Atlantan Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are helping some queer youths facing a problem that affects the LGBTQ community more than almost any other segment of the population: homelessness.Read More


Canadian Official Asks Trans Woman to Accommodate 'Spooked' Royal Representative

Filed by Mercedes Allen | December 21, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

A human rights complaint has been filed against Northwest Territories' Finance Minister Michael Miltenberger over an incident that occurred during the December 9th visit to Aurora College by Canada's new Governor General, David Johnston.Read More


Denver Broncos Pass on Making 'It Gets Better' Video

Filed by Viktor Kerney | December 21, 2011 | 9:00 AM | comments

Last week, a petition went out urging the Denver Broncos and Tim Tebow to make an 'It Gets Better' video. The petition quickly garnered 8000 signatures, however, yesterday morning the team passed on the idea.Read More

HIV meds

HIV 2 fer 1: Early Treatment Works & Truvada Prevents

Filed by D Gregory Smith | December 20, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

Today's HIV news shelf is crowded. Two stories on the HIV front involve good news about early HIV treatment and Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) to reduce infection rates among high-risk persons.Read More

King Family Car.jpg

The 'My Fabulous Disease' Holiday Spectacular!

Filed by Mark S. King | December 20, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

My mother's home here in Shreveport was fraught with excitement last week. Christmas decorations littered the living room, the almond scent of cookies filled the air, and last minute arrangements made it feel like a major production was underway.Read More

hospital-patient.jpg (PostBlurb)

Lesbian Partner Denied Hospital Visitation

Filed by Bil Browning | December 20, 2011 | 11:30 AM | comments

Looks like Rolling Hills Hospital staff in Franklin, Tennessee didn't get the memo from the Obama administration that they can't deny partners of LGBT patients visitation rights.Read More

US soldier

Will VA Hospitals Care for Gay & Lesbian Veterans?

Filed by Guest Blogger | December 20, 2011 | 10:30 AM | comments

By the end of 2011, more than 40,000 U.S. troops will return home from Iraq. Many of those troops will seek medical support from their local VA hospital. But is our VA system prepared to care for our gay and lesbian soldiers?Read More


Helping Out on the Resolution Front

Filed by Leslie Robinson | December 19, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

I've taken the liberty of composing New Year's resolutions for individuals who are just too busy to do it themselves.Read More


Iraq War Is Over but Suffering Continues for Gay Servicemembers

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 19, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

As soldiers left behind the sand, dust and struggle of the first American pre-emptive war and the gates between Iraq and Kuwait were closed on Sunday morning, dustups were just getting started in the US political arena. Was it worth it?Read More


The Pope Might Be Dying & Kim Jong Il Is Dead

Filed by Bil Browning | December 19, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

Looks like last week was a bad week for unbridled dictators, eh?Read More

Christmas-present-wrap.jpg (PostBlurb)

The Season of Giving & Receiving

Filed by Davina Kotulski | December 18, 2011 | 2:30 PM | comments

The other day I was flying to Los Angeles. The woman sitting next to me on the plane seemed pleasant. She looked like any other new-age Californian, only she wasn't.Read More


Ghosts from Christmases Past

Filed by Guest Blogger | December 18, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

It may not be possible, but try to let Christmas escape Facebook for at least a couple of hours, just long enough to unwrap a few presents and partake in the annual family squabble.Read More


Choosing a Better Browser

Filed by Terrance Heath | December 17, 2011 | 2:00 PM | comments

I've been a loyal Firefox user almost since version 1.0. I've branched out a bit. Right now, I use Chrome for work-related stuff, but when Chrome started acting up on me, I decided to give Opera a try.Read More


Santa Claus is Coming to Town?

Filed by Guest Blogger | December 17, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

Guest bloggers Jennifer Lau and Eileen Wacker argue that Christmas commercialization is a first world problem and grinches should just embrace it - and throw any negativity out like old wrapping paper.Read More


This Is Love in Action

Filed by Jeff Lutes | December 16, 2011 | 4:00 PM | comments

It seems to me that part of celebrating community is to rejoice in the successes, triumphs, and blessings of others. The following little video made me laugh, cry, and cheer for these two dads and their growing family... even though I have never met them.Read More


Advocates Applaud UN Report; LA City Council Denounces Nigeria

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 16, 2011 | 12:30 PM | comments

African human rights activists applauded the Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights for releasing the first-ever U.N. report documenting discriminatory laws, practices and acts of violence against individuals based on their sexual orientation and gender identity.Read More


Bachmann Backs Down on Ex-Gay Therapy Bill

Filed by Bil Browning | December 16, 2011 | 9:30 AM | comments

Truth Wins Out staffer John Becker, who went undercover at the clinic, got a bill for "missed appointments" from the charlatan and Bachmann even called Becker to demand payment. Now the huckster has backed down.Read More


CA Appeals Court Upholds Lesbian's Parenting Rights

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 15, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

Of all the knock-down, drag-out fights for equal rights, the battle over who gets the children at the end of a same sex relationship is one of the most excruciating. Read More

Bipolar disorder

8 Tips To Lower Holiday Stress [Rerun]

Filed by D Gregory Smith | December 15, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

Feeling stressed and/or depressed lately? You're not alone. The holiday season is reported to be "problematic" for about forty-five percent of the general population, and there may be added concerns for LGBTIQ persons. Read More


Burned By the (Kindle) Fire

Filed by Terrance Heath | December 15, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

A couple of months ago, I mused about possibly getting a Kindle Fire. Ultimately, I ended up getting a Kindle Touch, and I'm glad I did.Read More


I'm the Red Kettle Menace?

Filed by Bil Browning | December 14, 2011 | 6:00 PM | comments

Every year I do a post around the holidays to remind readers that the Salvation Army is a rightwing organization that discriminates against LGBT people. It's an old boycott stretching back over a decade, but this year my annual post really took off. Read More


How to Explain Marriage Equality to an Idiot

Filed by Bil Browning | December 14, 2011 | 10:15 AM | comments

Tired of hearing the rightwing nutjobs claim that if gays and lesbians can get married, soon people will be marrying their dog or their toaster? Here's a handy dandy chart to help you patiently explain the obvious differences.Read More


'Groundswell' Movement Defends Muslims and Gays

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 14, 2011 | 9:15 AM | comments

In our post-9/11 world, Muslims and Sikhs have endured extensive harassment and fear. One effort to overcome that religious bigotry is an eight-week reality show on TLC called "All-American Muslim" that follows five Lebanese families in Dearborn, Michigan. Read More

Tyler Clementi's Parents Speak to Today Show

Filed by Bil Browning | December 13, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

While most of the details about the circumstances of Tyler Clementi's suicide have been gleaned from court filings since his parents have refused all media interviews, Clementi's family has now started speaking out to promote an anti-bullying organization they founded following their son's death.Read More


Gay Syndicated Writer Paul Varnell Has Died

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 13, 2011 | 4:00 PM | comments

Perhaps the most prominent consistent voice for libertarian/independents was Paul Varnell, a one-time academic-turned-activist-turned-columnist, mostly for the Windy City Times. Some of Paul's columns would drive liberals and leftists crazy.Read More

Christmas-gifts.jpg (PostBlurb)

Give Till It Hurts

Filed by Guest Blogger | December 13, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

You have probably heard the rumors that the economy isn't so great these days. It is the holiday season and we're all spending money, whether we have it or not. I spent $20 bucks on a tree topper last week - and I'm Jewish.Read More


This Is Not a Paperweight

Filed by Bil Browning | December 13, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

Wait until Mom finds out what it really is...Read More


FedEx & Me, Or, Gee, Thanks Joan

Filed by Annette Gross | December 13, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

Once a month, I go to a FedEx/Kinko's office in my neighborhood. The employees there know me. Yesterday I went in to make copies for my PFLAG chapter's Bullied event and things took a turn for the worse.Read More


Do Ya Wanna (Kindle) Touch?

Filed by Terrance Heath | December 12, 2011 | 2:00 PM | comments

The answer, as far as I'm concerned, to the question in the title is the same as in the Joan Jett song I borrowed it from: "Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!"Read More


Catholic Priest Arrested for Possessing Child Porn

Filed by Bil Browning | December 12, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

Here's a story that I'm sure will rock you to the core. A Catholic priest has been arrested for possession of child porn. I know, you never saw that one coming, eh?Read More


Stereotypes about Black Lesbians

Filed by Amy Andre | December 12, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

This language feeds into a negative stereotype about black lesbians: that they don't know themselves - don't understand their own sexuality - as well as or as quickly as white lesbians know themselves.Read More


Craig Fox Stereotypes Rural Indiana [Comment of the Week]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 11, 2011 | 7:00 PM | comments

Over on the post about a Bluffton, Indiana man being harassed at a local gas station by an employee because of his sexual orientation, Projector Craig Fox weighs in with some arrogant assumptions about people from rural Indiana.Read More


My Three Closets

Filed by Guest Blogger | December 11, 2011 | 5:30 PM | comments

I guess you could say my closet door is transparent in the gender identity and sexual orientation departments. Oddly enough, though, I have one closet door that remains closed.Read More


Entertainment Financial Advisor Scott Maziroff Commits Suicide

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 11, 2011 | 4:00 PM | comments

That a well-liked, physically fit gay man who moved easily in the worlds of entertainment and WeHo social circles commits suicide at the age of 51 speaks volumes about how such deep depression is not limited to bullied LGBT teens.Read More

Ravi Rejects Plea Deal in Clementi Suicide Case

Filed by Bil Browning | December 11, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

Dharun Ravi has rejected the state's offered plea deal in the case alleging he caused Tyler Clementi's suicide. Ravi faces 15 criminal counts including violation of privacy and evidence tampering, but the plea deal seemed pretty lenient.Read More


Hungry for the Holidays

Filed by Terrance Heath | December 11, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

Just in time for the holidays, conservatives are presenting their latest gift to America's political discourse. Not satisfied with having creating climate change denialism, it looks like conservatives are applying their denialist model to another area: hunger.Read More


Gay Man Dies Waiting for Courts to Grant Marriage Rights

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 10, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

Watch this loving couple and tell me why it is conscionable to have allowed 78 year old Ed Watson to die before he was "granted" the freedom to marry the love of his life, Derence Kernek, before Alzheimer's claimed his memory of that love and his life.Read More


Memorial for Cassidy 'Chase' Vickers on Dec 17

Filed by Karen Ocamb | December 09, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

On Saturday, Dec. 17 from 2:00 pm - 4:00pm there will be a memorial for Cassidy "Chase" Vickers. The location will be at N. Gower St & Lexington Ave in Hollywood, the location where she was murdered last month.Read More


Indiana Clark Gas Station Declares 'F--k U Homos'

Filed by Bil Browning | December 08, 2011 | 5:25 PM | comments

After Bluffton, Indiana resident Josh Love walked into his local Clark station for a refill on a soda pop, he didn't expect to be verbally assaulted and short changed. Even worse, when he tried to contact the store's owner, he was cursed at and told not to come back to the store.Read More


Don We Now Our (Censored) Apparel

Filed by Adam Polaski | December 08, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

In Michigan this week, a music teacher came under fire for changing the words of "Deck the Halls," the super famous Christmas carol, so that the word "gay" didn't have to be a part of the lyrics.Read More


Advanced Hole Cleaning [Caption This]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 08, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

Okay, folks. What's your best caption for this one? I know some of you are experts on this subject...Read More


The Greatest Predictor of the End of Your Relationship

Filed by Jeff Lutes | December 08, 2011 | 9:00 AM | comments

What is the greatest single predictor of relationship break-up? Can you guess the correct answer?Read More

black santa

The Value of Asking for What You Want

Filed by Mark S. King | December 07, 2011 | 2:00 PM | comments

Wanting is not limited to children, my friends. But we might take a lesson from their transparency.Read More


Hungarians Win! European Penis Size Map

Filed by Bil Browning | December 07, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

I was originally going to title this post "Hungarians Have Huge Hardons" but then I did the conversion from centimeters to inches.Read More


In Defense of Affirming Christians

Filed by Mercedes Allen | December 07, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

This post is long overdue. When I decry some of the radical and unhinged rhetoric that comes from some people who use the Bible as their justification, I try to be clear that that these harms shouldn't be attributed to all Christians.Read More


Troy MI Mayor Gets Earful Over 'Queer' Remark [Video]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 06, 2011 | 1:00 PM | comments

Troy, Michigan's tea party mayor, Janice Daniels, is in hot water after posting an anti-gay slur on her Facebook page. The new mayor posted "Going to throw away my I Love New York bag now that queers can get married."Read More


How Wall Street Can Stay Greedy & Be Well Loved

Filed by Anthony Carter | December 06, 2011 | 11:00 AM | comments

I have taught and worked in a variety of places with a variety of young people and some annoying and not always productive adults. Money is not the issue here. We have to change our thinking.Read More


The $68 Louis Vuitton Condom

Filed by Bil Browning | December 06, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

Yes, it's a real thing. Why screw like a commoner when you can be sheathed with a luxury designer brand rubber?Read More


Anti-Gay Book Placed in Las Vegas Hotel

Filed by Mike Rogers | December 05, 2011 | 7:00 PM | comments

In Las Vegas I encountered a book titled "How to Kill Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Americans." I asked myself, "What do I do next?"Read More


Gratuitous Oiled Turkish Men Wrestling

Filed by Bil Browning | December 05, 2011 | 6:00 PM | comments

Projector Josh sent in this video saying, "I know how you appreciate sports." Oh, I do, Josh. I do.Read More


Albany Newspaper's Extensive Pieces on Trans Community (Featuring Me!)

Filed by Drew Cordes | December 05, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

The Albany Times Union, the newspaper of record for New York's capital, is running an extensive four-day report on the transgender community in the region.Read More

handwritten note

HIV Receives Its First Hate Mail in 30 Years

Filed by Anthony Carter | December 05, 2011 | 4:00 PM | comments

Dear HIV, I am sending you this brief note because once again you have pissed me off.Read More


The Saddest (& Most Empowering) Video You'll See Today

Filed by Adam Polaski | December 04, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

Last night my Facebook news feed blew up with friends posting links to this video, created by Jonah Mowry, an eighth grader who wanted to share his personal experience with the Internet. Just watch it. Read More


They Ate the (Pizza) Pie!

Filed by Bil Browning | December 03, 2011 | 6:00 PM | comments

After hearing about eight AIDS activists jailed in an Occupy Wall Street protest complained that the NYPD ate the pizzas other activists sent them, I'm reminded of Al Sharpton's MSNBC commercial. They ate the pie! The pizza pie!Read More


The Rightwings' Worst Nightmare

Filed by Joe Mirabella | December 03, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

Right wingers should learn something from this child. We can get to married to anyone we love.Read More


PA School Refuses Admission to HIV+ Student

Filed by Bil Browning | December 02, 2011 | 12:00 PM | comments

You'd think all schools would have heard about Ryan White by now, but apparently the prestigious Milton Hershey boarding school doesn't teach modern history.Read More

rest area sign 1.jpg

The Long Road Home from Relapse

Filed by Mark S. King | December 01, 2011 | 5:00 PM | comments

The drug relapse came over me like a sickness, slowly, over weeks. My addiction had already begun rearranging my thoughts in a bid for dominance over the vigilant recovery I had practiced for nearly three years.Read More

Wendy Williams

Wendy Williams: 'Ending HIV Is Not Magic'

Filed by Michael Emanuel Rajner | December 01, 2011 | 3:30 PM | comments

Like most gay men, I absolutely love it when our divas stand tall in their high heels and speak out to end HIV. I'm willing to put on high heels and stand up to end HIV along side Wendy Williams. Will you?Read More

Love in the Afternoon: Vintage Photo

Filed by Gloria Brame, Ph.D. | December 01, 2011 | 3:00 PM | comments

Two dapper, handsome men showing some love on a park bench, ca. 1920s-1930s.Read More

okin cover med.jpg

Bear Finds Homo Home

Filed by Paige Schilt | December 01, 2011 | 2:00 PM | comments

Fellow Bilerico Project contributor Jeff Lutes has a new book called Okin the Panda Bear Finds His Family. It's a magical tale about feeling different and finding your peeps, a fable for all ages about deaf culture, adoption, and non-traditional families.Read More


Do You Know Someone Who Died of AIDS? [Open Thread]

Filed by Bil Browning | December 01, 2011 | 10:00 AM | comments

This post originally ran in late 2009. I'm reposting it for World AIDS Day since it resulted in one of the most beautiful comment threads in the site's history. I'm hopeful several of you will share your experiences and recreate the magic.Read More